Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Celebrities I've Waited On.


Celebrity: Robert Plant

Date: 1998

Location: Mity Nice Grill, Chicago

Robert Plant came into my restaurant and sat in my section. I was rather excited, this being the first celebrity I had ever waited on and no minor celeb at that. He was curt, but polite, ordering a salad and coke, meeting my gaze with his own. Our mutual respect was obvious.

"Good choice, that's what I had today."
"Great, uh...thanks."

People began to realize who he was, creating an audible stir throughout the restaurant. One of my tables passed me a hundred, ordering me to pay for Robert's meal with it. Taking some pride in my new position as guest artist/collaborator on Robert's lunch; I told him I had to ask Mr. Plant. He rejected the offer out of hand. He seemed to find it silly. I silently agreed with him. This lunch didn't need guys like him, Robert.

After he had finished his meal and paid, I found myself in the bathroom with him. This being before the days of widespread cell phones, he was using the payphone. Later in the day we found he left his glasses resting on the phone. Trying them on I was a little put off by how dirty they were. How could he see out of these, I asked myself. I wear glasses. A single speck of dust on my lens will drive me insane. His had multiple thumbprints, entire areas light would have trouble passing through. How would I ever listen to "Physical Graffiti" again? He had tipped 20%, but I couldn't shake the feeling that I'd witnessed the dirty side of Rock & Roll.

19 comments:

dirty said...

Did he ever come back for his glasses?

Phil said...

No.

goethean said...

hilarious.

Phil said...

Thanks for reading.

dirty said...

did you notice the "man toe" in the picture???

Phil said...

Oh yeah.

dirty said...

I can't stop looking...shit.

Phil said...

Robert Plant. Rockstar. Huge cock.

dirty said...

I think it's a sock...just sayin'

Johnny Yen said...

Hey-- he wasn't the biggest, according to Cynthia Plastercaster. You wouldn't believe who was.

Megan said...

Was he wearing a shirt when he dined at your establishment?

And seriously, only 20% and he's Robert fucking Plant? Even I leave more than 20% and I'm not famous. I think that's only because I've waited tables though.

Phil said...

His shirt was open in a similar manner to his video for "Tall Cool One."

I was happy with 20% he is from Europe.

Dirty, I think he's the real deal.

Phil said...

testing...

Phil said...

testing...

dirty said...

1-2-3-4

haha

Grant Miller, Esq. said...

This is a great idea for a post!

dirty said...

Grant...I am full of ideas and much much more are you game?

Echo said...

I hear Grant Miller is *massive*... what would Cynthia Plastercaster think of that??

Phil said...

Echo,

I'm pretty sure Grant is who Johnny is talking about.

Phil