It's A Girl! We Think...

This is the latest sonogram we had done yesterday. All indications are that the baby is perfectly healthy. Right now we think it is a girl. The top image is our evidence. It is difficult to be sure. It's easier to see something that is there than to see something that "isn't" there. In this case, a penis. How many times have you heard that guys?

Sonograms are a strange thing. Though I have no reason to think anything could be wrong, and I have been through this twice before, it can still be taxing emotionally. As the nurse works the scanner around my wife's tummy, she stops and moves, massages and works the angle of the sonogram to get different views to record the info she needs. They intentionally place the view screen out of the mothers view. If anything is wrong, they would rather the doctors see it before the mother does. This isn't the case for me. I see everything as she does it.

So every time she stops to focus on something particular, I freak out a bit. I don't know what she is looking at. I don't know what I'm looking at. It's what I don't know that gets to me. Every blob that I can't identify. Every collection of white in the image makes me pause. Why is the nurse spending so much time looking at that? Has her posture changed? Is her body language indicative of a person seeing something bad? It makes me want to scream.

Those feeling are juxtaposed against feeling of wonder and amazement. I can see the heart beating. The stomach is visible, this is because, as I learned with my first son, that the baby will swallow the fluid which aids in forming their internal organs. When you can see the stomach, she has a full belly of fluid. All this is going on in my wife's belly. It makes me want to cry.

It's crazy. I can't recommend it enough.