Sunday, September 10, 2006

Random Elmhurstian Sightings.

A few months ago, a buddy of mine had a bachelor party. Perhaps the worst bachelor party a group of guys could throw for a friend. It ended up being rather fun, but at one point we were all standing around my broken down car after our lunch at a Blimpie's. Broken down car and Blimpie's are not two things you want at any bachelor party.

Later that evening, wandering from bar to bar in Lincoln Square, we stop at the Chicago BrauHaus. It's a nice German restaurant we go to from time to time. Unfortunately it was packed on this night. There was no way twenty guys were gonna fit comfortably in there.

Loitering out front, trying to decide where to go next, Dave and I needed to use the bathroom. We step into the Brauhaus to use their faculties. One of the stalls was in use so I took the free one. Dave used the toilet. Dave finishes first and moves to the sink. I guess he washes his hands after using the bathroom. Yuppie. Anyway, Dave is from Elmhurst too.

He wonders out loud, "What was the name of that German place in Elmhurst?"

Still standing at the urinal, "I don't remember any German place in Elmhurst."

"It used to be right downtown."

"Must have been before my time."

"What was the name of that place?"

"I don't know, Dave."

Before we came to blows over this, from my left at the next urinal I hear, "The
Heidelberg."

Dave exclaims, "That's it! The Heidelberg."


Zipping-up I turn to look at the person talking.
I haven't noticed this guys face because, well, men don't really look at each other in the bathroom. Now that I am looking at him there's something familiar.

"Guido?"

"Yes?"

"Guido!"

"Phil."

Excited, and more than alittle drunk, I holler "Dave, Guido's here!"

I also begin to kick Guido in the ass as he still stands facing the urinal. From what I remember, Guido was the type of funlovin' guy who wouldn't mind being kicked in the ass as he is trying to zip-up.

I'm not getting that from him tonight.

Guido is a former Elmhurst resident and York High School alum. Turns out Guido is there to propose to his girlfriend, who works at Chicago Brauhaus. I guess he doesn't like getting kicked in the ass, standing at a urinal, right before he is about to ask the women he loves to spend the rest of his life with him. Yuppie.

Guido invites us to come back in awhile to see it all go down. Unfortunately, we can't guarantee anything.
Snapping a picture in the bathroom and wishing him good luck; we walk up the stairs and out the door. Bachelor parties being what they are, we never do return.

I hope it went well. I hope they are happy. I hope I wasn't the only guy to kick you in the ass on your engagement night.





6 comments:

Megan said...

I was at a bar recently and there were chicks taking pictures of each other (I assume) in the STALL in the bathroom. I thought this was fairly weird at the time, but maybe there are photographic opportunities in a public restroom not to be found elsewhere.

Phil said...

Oh yes. Many opportunities. Some subjects are better than others, of course.

Johnny Yen said...

I definitely felt like my first two marriages kicked my ass. Maybe it's good practice for Guido.

Anonymous said...

I'm proud to say that I'm standing up in that wedding. I spent six months living out of a van with Guido. He is a dirty bitch.

Anonymous said...

I was totally there, but I ignored each of you.

Phil said...

You'll get your's Miller.